How much do you know about grouse hunting?
If your answer is, “What the heck is a grouse?” then you are in the vast majority of humanity. I was you once. Then I met my husband. Now I’m married with a hunting dog and a coop full of training pigeons. Life comes at you fast.
**Note** In case you care, a grouse is a bird. It’s about the size of a chicken. Also, since we get this question a lot, no our pigeons do not die in the course of training. They’re homing pigeons, so once the dog finds them in a field then we launch them into the air with a pigeon launcher (yes, this is a real thing), and they fly home. Okay. Glad we covered the logistics. On to my story.
Yesterday I tried to get our dog Ruby to come in from the back yard. I called her, but she wouldn’t come. I went outside to investigate, and she was on point. This means she was frozen in place, pointing out a bird for a non-existent hunter to shoot. I think it was a cardinal or something. Definitely not a food bird. I didn’t take a picture, but here’s what our type of dog looks like when she’s on point:
My husband wasn’t home, and I couldn’t remember what he usually says to make Ruby break point. I tried a few things:
“At ease!”
“Un-point!”
“You’re free!”
“GREEN LIGHT!”
Nothing worked. She moved only her eyeballs to look at me like, “Hello…shoot the bird…”
She’s fifty pounds, so I wasn’t about to go pick up her frozen-in-place body and haul her inside (on second thought, it would have been hilarious if she tried to hold the pose while I was carrying her!). Suddenly, I had the perfect idea.
I went inside and pulled out our Wild West board game called Bang. There’s a cap gun in that game that’s really loud. I walked back outside and tried to call Ruby in again. She stayed on point (shocker).
I pointed the gun in the general direction of the bird and shot. BANG! Ruby was satisfied and immediately ran to me happily like, “Did you get it? Wasn’t that awesome?!” Whatever, dog. I probably gave the poor bird a tiny heart attack.
Now our neighbors probably think we’re the nutter house. Well, that ship probably sailed long ago. They’re simply marking this up as one more reason to move: “Hey, Maude! Crazy chick next door is shooting cardinals! Did you call on that house over on the other side of town yet?”
IT WAS A CAP GUN, PEOPLE. NO ANIMALS WERE HARMED IN THE MAKING OF THIS BLOG POST.
Gave me a good laugh lol
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Thanks!! I’m glad! 🙂 It made me laugh too. What a weird dog.
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I think it’s neat!
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Omg I posted my pants. Epic! I love your style, love it
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Uhm, ya, I didn’t post my pants–that would be weird–I posted them laughing lol
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Hahahahaha! I was like, “Ummm…posted his pants?” I got the idea. 🙂 So glad it made you laugh! I promise it was even funnier in person. You should have seen me out there shooting at the poor cardinal with this ridiculous plastic gun, and my dog was SO VERY SERIOUS about the whole situation.
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Yes, you wrote of it with perfection and wit. Particularly your outside commentary. I like your personality, it shines in your writing
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Thanks, Rob. That’s really kind. I like your personality too, at least from how you seem in the the blog world!
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At least how I seem lol. This is all of me more than I show in real life haha
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That’s good! Blogs tend to be that way, I think… I feel like I’m more authentic here too. Maybe it feels safe because it’s online? Whatever the reason, I’m thankful I have it. I’m thankful you have it too. We all need a place to be our real selves.
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Yes, I am trying to be more authentic everyday I get better. Sometimes it’s a lot of work in the absence of the commonalities like the ones we can share here
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You never fail to make me laugh. Ever. This is HILARIOUS!!!
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YAY! So glad you liked it! It’s not even like I had to try to make that funny, though. It was hilarious in real life.
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What a great dog! Love it!
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Thanks. 🙂 We like her!
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Thank you for a hardy laugh on an otherwise ho-hum day.
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Anytime! It made my day to hear I made you smile!
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Awww..did she get belly rubs for being such a good doggie?
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Even better – she got to chew a rawhide. Near as I can tell, that’s the equivalent of buying a human a new car. VERY VERY EXCITING!
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Yay!
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