Since I frequently blog about insanity, it’s a wonder that the American political system hasn’t made an appearance until today.
This evening I will be watching the first presidential debate between Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton. I will also be feeling a bit guilty, because I accidentally lied to some German students during the summer of 2105. They might still be mad about it.
I was in Germany with a group of fourteen other teachers, and we were visiting schools as part of our study of the German education system. Trump had just announced he was running for president. A group of students asked us, “Why is Donald Trump running for president in America? Do you think he will win?” EVERY teacher, from the most liberal to the most conservative, vehemently assured these tender German teenagers that America would never vote for Trump. We didn’t even know why he was running.
I thought about those German teenagers this morning. I wondered if they would watch this debate, and I decided probably yes. They were very interested in American politics. Then I thought, how many people in how many countries will watch this thing? Then my imagination started rolling… Here are the conversations I envision happening in various countries regarding this debate:
Irish dude 1: Hey chum, you wanna chill with me and me mates while we watch America continue self-imploding?
Irish dude 2: Sure! I’ll pick up some Guinness on the way.
Mexican dude 1 (to no one in particular): America had better not elect Trump. There is no way I’m building that frickin wall. *eats a taco*
British lady 1: Would you like a cup of tea? Shall we watch the American presidential debate?
British lady 2: Of couse, dah-ling. Who is running?
British lady 1: It’s Mrs. Clinton and that Trump fellow.
British lady 2: Oh bloody hell.
Canadian guy 1: Looks like America has gotten themselves in a pickle, eh?
Canadian guy 2: How’s our immigration policy? Maybe we should build a wall…
(No one in Switzerland watches it. They’re always neutral, so their foreign policy game is a bit lacking. For Switzerland, just imagine people enjoying a normal day. Perhaps they hear a far off yodel).
German teenager 1: Stupid Americans.
German teenager 2: Yup.
(My bad, guys! I’m just as surprised as you are!!)
Watching this election season is like watching a bad reality show where the winner gets a country. Someone should suggest airing this debate on MTV, because that’s where this crazy belongs. Does anyone else feel like politics has turned into show business but for ugly people? Because that is what it feels like.
Ack! I just pictured Trump and Clinton as contestants on The Bachelor(ette). Can you imagine the fantasy suite episode? Stop! Don’t imagine it! The mental image buuurrrnnsss! MAKE IT STOP!!
America’s a weird place to live right now. I think I’d rather be drinking the Guinness and eating the taco. But hey, maybe the contestants (oops, nominees) will surprise us and prove to be really knowledgeable, articulate, and respectful this evening. We can always hope. The fact that they’re there in the first place proves that in America, anything can happen.